Happiness is a Warm Gun

A man’s home is his castle, right? That is until said castle is invaded.
Last night I went out with Barnes (in town from the ATL), Friddle, Beat Dave,
Ramona & her husband CanucKen. We were doing the downtown sleeze bar thing
until Midnight or so. I was in bed by 12:45. I was awoken to the sound of breaking glass an hour later.
At first I thought it could be car window or one of the neighbors in the ghetto apartments fighting.
Then I heard noise by the front door. I thought it was Mister Surly wanting to come in (he went out when I got home).

As I approached the door I noticed the front stoop was black, meaning my porch light was out for some reason.
I crept up on the door and I heard the door handle rattle…
I peered through my blinds only to see a small window busted out and a large, menacing man on the other side!!!

I jumped back into the middle of my living room and yelled “Who the FUCK are you?! What do you want?!!”

No sound.

I turned on the living room light and grabbed the phone, dialing 911 as I entered my bedroom.

The 911 operator was nice and calmed me as much as I think I could be calmed.
She asked me to describe the man, what happened, if I was armed, etc. She said
not to answer the door until the police arrived. We talked and kept her on the
line until I saw the black & white roll up. She said they were responding to
another break-in in the neighborhood. I heard voices in the courtyard and knew
right then, someone else had been intruded on.

After a few minutes I saw flashlights hit my door and the police announced themselves.
They informed me a vagrant was to blame for the attempted break-in.
That he had actually entered another unit in the compound and was in her house
while she was sleeping. She was awoken by the sound of him sitting down on the
end of her bed. She yelled at the bum and he ran into her bathroom.
When the officers arrived, he had removed all of his clothes and was sitting
on the shitter. They arrested him and told me that it was an isolated incident.

I spent the next 30 minutes cleaning up all the broken glass from my window,
the porch light cover he used to break said window, getting cardboard to cover
the gaping hole in the door, and calming myself & Mister down.

I have lived in North Park and have felt relatively safe for 6 years.
It might be time to Lock-and-Load.